Polyamory requires partners to navigate their relationships with more consideration and awareness than monogamous couples. Monogamous couples have the benefit of an already determined relationship structure. While polyamory is not for every couple (nor is it for most couples), this thoughtfulness could teach monogamous couples a thing or two about how to tend to theirRead more
Conflicts About Pets Often Symbolize Deeper Relationship Issues for Couples: Director of Supervision and Training Kelly Scott in The Wildest
If you’re fighting with your partner over your cats getting along or whether the dog can be in the bedroom during sex, is the conflict really about the pet(s)? Often it’s not. Our Director of Supervision and Training Kelly Scott recently spoke to The Wildest in three articles that break down how couples’ arguments overRead more
We Nearly Blamed Rose: Why the “Other Woman” Trope Is So Persistent
One of the biggest social media frenzies of conspiracy theorizing and innuendo in recent memory was the furor around the whereabouts and well-being of Kate Middleton. After Kate’s announcement of her cancer diagnosis, there should be a moment of reflection, including how and why Lady Rose Hanbury was dragged into the fervor by being incorrectlyRead more
Miscarriages Are Far Too Isolating: We Need to Talk About Them More
How we talk about pregnancy leaves women and their families alone with the experience of miscarriage A miscarriage is a complicated loss that is very often silenced by how we talk—or don’t talk—about pregnancy. There is a collective rule to not share pregnancy news until after about twelve weeks when the risk of a miscarriageRead more
Apologies Aren’t Always Nice (Part 2): How to Do Them More Thoughtfully (Hint: Slow Down)
Before apologizing, ask yourself: Am I expecting the hurt person to forgive me immediately? In the previous part of this two-part series, I laid out how some forms of apologizing can put pressure on the hurt party to make the transgressor feel better as soon as possible. But people who struggle with tolerating the discomfortRead more
Apologies Aren’t Always Nice (Part 1)
Apologies aren’t always as straightforward as an attempt to open the door for reconnection You will hurt the people you care about. Ideally, apologizing is a way to own this mistake and make it clear to the person you hurt that you recognize your transgression, take accountability for it, and assure you’ll do your bestRead more
Having Needs Is Human: A Therapist Grapples With Deceptions, Estrangements, and the Denial of Needs in ‘Maestro’
“I don’t need!”: Having needs is an essential part of being human I can’t stop thinking about a scene from Maestro in which Carey Mulligan’s Felicia Montealegre addresses her husband’s deceptions and estrangements. She says, “It’s just so ironic; I would look at everyone—even my own children—with such pity because of their longing for hisRead more
Want to Raise Unspoiled Kids? Teach Them to Grapple With Values
Spoiling yourself and being frugal are competing values that children watch their parents navigate There is a notable tension between the value of parents raising children who aren’t spoiled and the values of capitalism. “Spoil yourself,” as well as the related “indulge” or “treat-yo-self,” have become virtues nearly synonymous with “self-care.” Even the hyphenated self-careRead more
Founder and Clinical Director Matt Lundquist on Sex Therapy (And Why Your Therapy Also Needs to Be Talking About Sex) in The Cut
Sex therapists are skilled specialists who have something to offer that even a very sex-positive and sex-savvy therapist doesn’t. However, if you’re not also talking about sex in therapy, whether couples therapy or individual therapy, your therapy is lacking. Our Founder and Clinical Director Matt Lundquist recently spoke to The Cut about what to lookRead more
How to Not Raise Spoiled Kids: Founder and Clinical Director Matt Lundquist in The Huffington Post
Some of the hardest work for parents is to tolerate that their children can both be wonderful and do things that aren’t so wonderful. However, this fact, along with the need to name and, when necessary, give consequences for bad behavior, is a key piece of raising kids who aren’t spoiled. Our Founder and ClinicalRead more
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