When Struggling With Communication, It’s Helpful For Couples To Talk Through A Plan
Recently, Parade Magazine spoke with Tribeca Therapy about how a “baby contract” can help parents organize themselves, communicate, and make fewer assumptions. Talking to writer Brittany Galla, our director Matt explains that the “number one issue couples reach out to us for is communication.” In practice, couples are often referring to any one of dozens of communication challenges. But, no matter the specific challenge, one common intervention on our part is to urge transparency and clarity. This often looks like drafting contract by taking the time to talk through a plan.
Childcare Is An Area Where Couples Often Make Assumptions
Talking through a plan can be especially helpful with caring for a baby. “Childcare is an area where couples often make assumptions,” says Matt in the article, “based on how they were raised or even an interpretation of things their partner has said or inferences based on a sense of who their partner is.” A plan, Matt continues, “allows the opportunity to test those assumptions, to make them clear and bring attention sooner (pre-baby) to what might live in conflict.”
The Activity of Creating A Contract May Have More Value Than The Contract Itself
Sometimes, Matt observes, “the activity of creating the contract has more value even than the contract itself.” The act of making a contract in and of itself can be “a meaningful exercise in speaking with clarity, identifying what each (and both) parent’s values are, and working through disagreements.” Even if in practice the contract is thrown out the window, the exercise is one that has great value (and will no doubt need to be revisited again and again).