The Best Therapist In NYC? You

Who is the best therapist in NYC? It’s you. Sure, you seek out therapy as you would any expert. A therapist’s skill is judged just like any other specialist in NYC. If you’re recovering from an accident, you want the best physical therapist in NYC, or, if you need an accountant, you search for the best accountant and so on. But, searching for the best therapist is different.

The Best Therapist In NYC Is Dependent On You

Why is searching for the best therapist different? Because the success or failure of therapy, more than anything else, is dependent on what you bring to the table.

We’re used to a certain experience with medicine–in a sense, “Hold still, this won’t hurt a bit.” The physician with the physician’s tools (X-rays, blood tests, etc.) makes a diagnosis, while you are, in the most cases, passive (in fact, holding still is often the only imperative on the patient). The physician considers the results of an assessment and forms a diagnosis–rarely in concert with the patient as active participant. Treatment works similarly. Treatment comes in the form of medication or, occasionally, a procedure, which, in nearly all cases, the directive is to “sit still.”

Perhaps we all wish it were so in matters of emotionality: Find the best therapist in NYC, turn your head and cough, and take your medicine as directed. While the best therapist may function as a sort of coach, your required participation in the treatment is more complex. It’s more than just motivation and follow-through.

The Best Therapy Is A Custom-Tailored Partnership

While this might seem off-topic, I recently renovated my kitchen. Some of the tasks I needed an expert for. I found the best, explained the job, the expert diagnosed it, so to speak, and completed the task. In the case of other tasks, I knew enough to do them myself and sweated it out. There was a third set of tasks: ones that I knew something about, but needed a partner–another set of hands, as well as someone to help me think through the best plan of attack. We, then, framed a wall, hung the cabinets and repaired the drywall. It was a partnership.

So too with therapy. The best therapy is a partnership in which the client helps shape not only the content, but also the form of the therapy itself. At its most helpful, the best therapy is a process of co-invention of a new form of therapy–one created just for you. It’s hard to imagine anything we seek help for that needs to be so custom-tailored as therapy.

From Method to Methodology

Why is this essential? You are unique. You’ve lived in your body for some time. You’re smart and capable. You bring a lifetime of experiences and know something about what works and what doesn’t. You’ve read self-help books, perhaps studied Bhudism and existentialism, and quite likely, have been in some form of therapy before.

The best therapist has some of those assets, along with formal training in this or that methodology. All tools are welcome if they are used in the service of creating the best therapy possible. Hopefully none, however, are used dogmatically. There should be a self-consciousness about the value of a given tool, an intentionality in the choice to use it, and a willingness to shift it or throw it out altogether if it turns out not to be useful.

What Kind Of Therapy Do You Practice?

I used to hate this question because I wasn’t sure how to answer. My “style” from one session at my NYC therapy practice to the next felt so different that I worried I lacked focus. I might have done something to change that except for one thing: It was so clearly helpful to my clients. One patient needed me to sit back and listen, create space for her to be heard, and the next needed strict directions and a plan of action. Other differences were more subtle.

So I Pick What Kind Of Therapy I Want?

Not exactly. The best therapist brings expertise–the knowledge learned formally from other therapists, as well as the wisdom that comes after thousands of hours in the chair, grinding it out with people in pain. You’ll very likely need some guidance. The best therapist’s skill is in leading this process to maximize the tools at hand to create the best therapy possible together.

The Best Therapist Sets You Up With Tools For The Next Challenge

The best therapy does more than help with the challenge at hand. By inviting you to help create the best therapy, you not only create just the right help for the matter you’re facing right now, you also become skilled at creating therapies for the next challenge (and the next one). You don’t just use one of the therapist’s tools. You become skilled at making tools for your own emotional growth.