Family
Parents, Want To Build Influence With Your Kids? Try Co-Creating Rules
Parenting Therapy: Who Are You That This Child Should Listen To You And Your Rules?. When working with parents in my NYC therapy practice, I often invite them to think about the following question: Who are you that this child should listen to you? It’s not intended at all to be smug, though I respect that it can tend to come off that way. When kids are quite little, the question doesn’t matter…
Apr 19, 2018The Death Of A Sibling Changes Everything
Losing a Sibling Is A Shock That Changes Everything. In our NYC therapy practice, we treat patients who have to deal with the many changes that come with grieving the loss of a sibling. No matter what your relationship was with your brother or sister, he or she has likely always been there in one way or another–on holidays, at birthdays, on weekends or even, daily. There was a rhythm to the way…
Apr 05, 2018Beyond “The Right” Decision: Helping Teens Become Decision Makers
Parents, Therapists And Other Adults Need To Help Teens Be Decision Makers. As a therapist who works with teens, I know teens have to face tons and tons of decisions all the time. The reality of being a teenager is there are certain adult decisions that have to be made for you. You can’t, for example, sell drugs, drive drunk, move out or spend money you don’t have. Most of these limits are…
Jan 18, 2018New Year's Resolution For Parents: Get Closer To Your Teen (How Family Therapy Can Help)
Parents, Your Teenager Needs You To Get Closer: Family Therapy Can Help. As an NYC family therapist, I’ve seen firsthand how hard it can be for teens to help their parents learn how to get closer and be there for them. For parents of teens, the New Year can be a good opportunity to check in with your relationship with your adolescent child. Does your relationship with your teen need more…
Dec 21, 2017Want To Make A Difference With Teens, In Or Out Of Therapy? Focus On Influence
Having Influence With Teens Is Essential Both In Therapy And Out. Being close with teens is important, but it’s not the magic sauce. Or perhaps it’s best to say, there’s magic sauce in being close in that it can allow for influence. Influence is where it’s at for any relationship. For therapists, parents and anyone who cares about a teen, the primary question is: how can we influence teens to…
Sep 14, 2017Parenting A Teen With Panic Attacks
Getting Close Is The Key To Parenting Teens With Panic Attacks. Working with both teens and parents of teens as an NYC therapist, I often see parents feel lost when their teen suffers from panic attacks. Not only are parents unsure of how to deal with panic attacks, but they can also struggle with understanding what causes them–a build-up of overwhelming anxiety. Panic attacks are a physical…
Sep 07, 2017From Safe Touch to Saying No: An NYC Therapist On Talking To Your Kid To Prevent Sexual Abuse
As A Therapist And Parent, I Know Tough Conversations With Your Child Can Prevent Sexual Abuse. In addition to being an NYC therapist, I’m also a father and I recently had to talk to my daughter about sexual abuse, safe touch and saying no. These conversations are never fun–they can be tough for both children and parents (They can even be difficult to write about in a blog format). But, it’s…
Aug 31, 2017Culture Matters In Couples Therapy
Culture Matters, Even For Couples Of The “Same Culture”. In my couples therapy practice, I often say to couples that we are all in and of a culture. How you see the world and how decisions are made about issues like monogamy, raising children, sharing a home, etc. are all cultural matters. Which is to say, they are influenced not only by where you come from geographically and ethnically, but also…
Jul 13, 2017Family-Wide Anxiety
Entire Families Can Feel Anxiety Together. Anxiety is often thought of and talked about on an individual basis. But, entire families can experience anxiety together. These can be divided into two types of anxiety: family anxiety and anxiety that is precipitated by one person but bleeds into the entire family system.Beginning with the former, family anxiety simply means anxiety that permeates…
Apr 13, 2017Having Plenty Doesn't Mean Money Issues Go Away: 11 Steps For Couples
Financial Couples Therapy Doesn’t Just Address A Lack Of Money. In my work with financial couples therapy, I’ve learned that everyone feels they don’t have enough money, even couples with plenty. I find it sobering to recognize that even folks with access to money that I could never imagine worry about money. It’s important to me, as well as the couples I work with, to recognize that money is, in…
Mar 09, 2017Therapy For Cutting: How To Talk With Your Teen And Help Them Talk About What They Are Feeling
Often when parents seek therapy for teens who are struggling with depression or anxiety, they are also looking for therapy for cutting. Cutting is when someone is takes an object such as a knife (dull or sharp), scissors, a paper clip or another sharp object and cuts themselves with it to create a painful but releasing sensation. Cutting falls into the category of self-harm behaviors, which also…
Feb 09, 2017Your Kid is Just Not That Into You: Rebellion and Teens
As a parent, does it ever seem like your teen is sick of you, not that interested in what you have to say and avoids you? Well, you're right. Your teen is just not that into you.Just like the 2005 book He’s Not That Into You, if it feels like your adolescent wants space from you, that is probably right. An adolescent looking for space and rebelling from their parents is a longstanding cliche.…
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