Blog
On ease and happiness: What history can teach us about therapy and depression
On Christmas morning I happened to catch CNN's Fareed Zakaria interviewing historian David McCullough, loosely on the topic of a McCullough's new book about the wave of 19th Century American emigrants to Paris and more broadly on the topic of what we can, at our present moment, learn from history. I was not expecting a lesson on depression and therapy, but I found one.This of McCullough's remarks…
Jan 16, 2012
Incrementalism
I must have heard Martin Luther King, Jr.'s I Have a Dream speech a hundred times. Today, as we celebrate his birthday, I heard something new:This is no time to engage in the luxury of cooling off or to take the tranquilizing drug of gradualism. Now is the time to make real the promises of democracy. Now is the time to rise from the dark and desolate valley of segregation to the sunlit path of…
Jan 16, 2012
Beyond managed care: Out-of-network psychotherapy in NYC
For the purpose of this conversation, psychotherapists in NYC (the market is quite different elsewhere) can be roughly divided into two camps: those who accept insurance as an in-network provider and those who do not.When we talk about psychotherapists, by the way, we're including a whole lot of folks: psychologists, psychiatrists, clinical social workers, marriage and family therapists, even…
Jan 09, 2012
People hate me on Yelp
Google Local, too. No kidding.A friend of mine brought it to my attention a few weeks ago, as delicately as she could: "You have a Yelp problem."It took a moment for it to click. I hadn't even remembered that I was on Yelp, so the concept of having a problem with Yelp was a bit of a puzzle. It turns out it was one of those things my web designer encouraged me to do a few years back when she built…
Jan 02, 2012
An activity-ist walks into a bar
I've talked quite a bit here about the critical question in shaping a life being whether you're an activist or a passivist. What I should have done was use two made-up words: Activity-ist and passivist. The position I mean to advocate is really one that places what we do (activity) at the center of a life-building plan.So what does happen when someone who believes in this activity-driven way of…
Jan 01, 2012
"Astoria for grief" and the managed-care swap meet
You can imagine my momentary confusion on spotting this subject line from an unfamiliar email address:"Astoria for grief."The title reminded me of one of those 1970's only-in-NYC thrillers, like The Taking of Pelham 123, or The French Connection, or even the Spider-Man series, and I began to envision a hospice-worker protagonist rushing to catch the Queens-bound R train, then dodging behind seats…
Oct 31, 2011
Diversifying your (relationship) portfolio: Pop songs lie
I'm not much of a stocks and bonds guy, but practicing therapy not far from NYC's financial district, I've learned a few things about investing from some of my patients. Among the more straightforward pecuniary principles is the notion of a diversified portfolio. The idea is that, no matter how psyched you are about a particular investment (or kind of investment), it's best to spread your money…
Oct 25, 2011
Optimism v. pessimism? Bo-ring! The real question is, are you an activist or a passivist?
Every now and then I get accused of something truly awful: Being an optimist.I object (strenuously) not because the real story is that I'm a pessimist (I'm not) but because the very premise of a categorization of optimist versus pessimist is grounded in passivity.The assumption in the very asking of the question is meant to inquire as to whether or not, generally speaking, you believe your life…
Oct 20, 2011
Emotions are like 4 year-olds
I love my niece. She's brimming with curiosity, she's generous with hugs, she's silly and sincere all at the same time.Her parents love her too, of course. But they do not, under any circumstances (and as much as she may plead) let her drive.Sometimes she gets a choice about whether or not she wants ketchup on her hot dog (lately, she does) or whether she wants to brush her teeth before or after…
Oct 11, 2011
Two kinds of anxiety
1.The mysterious, complicated, mushed-up kind of anxiety:. You wake up and for seemingly no good reason you feel anxious. The sound of the shower turning on makes you jump; you feel a creeping anxiety as you leave the house; and the anxiety ebbs and flows in waves throughout the day. It's an ordinary day, and you just feel a nervous panic as you navigate your regular daily rituals.2. The "I'm…
Sep 06, 2011"What if 'the real you' is a jackass?" A case for fake.
I acted out on Facebook, and it wasn't the first time. But really, I couldn't help myself.It happens.Someone innocently posted this little bit of pith:"The real you is better than a fake someone else."You've heard something along those lines. (Probably in your Facebook feed). And it seems sensible. Except, consider the following: What if the "real you" is a jackass?That's exactly what I…
Aug 31, 2011Anger and the accident of Google
Last March I set about building this website. In the "age of the internet" I figured I'd write a lot to give prospective therapy patients in NYC a real taste of what my psychotherapy and group therapy practice has to offer. I wrote about therapy for depression, dating, drugs and alcohol, anxiety therapy--I covered the usual psychotherapy bases (and of course talked a bunch about the merits of…
Aug 29, 2011Browse all Tribeca Therapy topics
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